sin of lucifer

pride... the ultimate sin... i read somewhere (was it c.s. lewis' mere christianity?) that pride - the sin of Lucifer - is unique from other sins in that it is competitive... pride surfaces only when there is something else to compare with.. it's not quite the same for other sins like lust/ lies... if i had no blog to compare with, it would be hard for me to be proud of my blog.. and when i see other's blogs looking nice and pretty, the feelings of envy and disappointment with my own stem from a wounded pride... the constant strife to make my page look nicer is derived from the need to have it on par with or better than the others... yet pride also stops me from copying too many ideas for want of a unique page i can call my own creation! *sigh* why must i be susceptible to pride??

this pride problem spreads out to all areas of work.. esp in our meritocratic society where it's the case of 'may the best man win'.. i need renewing of my mind

Lord i've been spending late nights toying with html source codes from friends' blogs which i like.. forgive me for my chasing after the wind.. it is truly meaningless.. why do i still insist on it? pls don't harden my heart.. i will stop with the silly unspoken competition i have set up for myself.. yet no one sees my page either.. i was tempted to share my page with hm.. Lord remind me that this is first and foremost between You and me, not for others to see and judge me.. thank You for Your patience..